You’d have to pardon me, I should have sent this in since Saturday. But Theatre Arts and laziness are two dangerous factors that could hinder a good man from achieving his dreams. But Thespis is a liar; I’ll write today. The past week wasn’t so eventful, considering the fact that classes resumed immediately after resumption, and girls in the University of Ibadan didn’t refrain from asking boys like me for money.
The most significant of the events that happened last week was my visit to Lagos; the return journey. So, this bus gets stopped at Ibafo by another bus who tells our driver that a bag had fallen from his boot. Our driver quickly found somewhere to park the bus, and the search for the fallen bag began.
Two hours, no bag. The young Igbo man who owned the bag already had tears in his eyes. He claimed that the bag had 220,000 naira in it, and it was his savings from over a year of hustle in Lagos. I almost cried for him. His brother — or friend kept shaking his head and sighing as if they lost someone to death.
Imagine I had 220,000 naira that I have saved, and it fell off a bus due to the driver’s carelessness (I honestly wouldn’t care about whose fault it was). The driver would sell his bus, then I’ll take 500,000 because he caused me an emotional trauma, mental shock and intermittent shaking of my body. The 280,000 balance will go into medical care, body maintenance, and whatever thing the money can do. Unless, we will kill each other there.
I know you are wondering why I decided to name this after UI girls; I don’t know too. But this past week, I remembered all the times I had to spend an amount I didn’t initially plan because UI girls. The one that comes to mind was one time I went to this restaurant to eat with a female friend (also a student of the University of Ibadan). So we arrived at this restaurant, and she orders a meal of 1,700 naira. I on the other hand got a meal of 700 naira because food is not the way to heaven; and I was managing that 3,000 naira in my account.
So it happened that I completely finished my meal of 700 naira, while our aunty was telling me that she was full already after eating just half of the food. Imagine convincing somebody to eat after they said they were hungry. Now imagine further that you paid for the meal.
What most of you don’t know is that there is a hidden doctor in every young man. We just need some certain events to bring it to the fore. Mine was brought forward because of this event. I became a doctor to enlighten her on all the wonderful ways food can help the body.
Did you know that sugar causes your brain to work faster?
Didn’t you know that haemoglobin is the secret to having a first class, and plantain gives you that?
How didn’t you know that tuberculosis is caused by a lack of good food?
Better eat so you won’t have tuberculosis.
Unfortunately, she didn’t still eat the food. If you hear of one girl that has Tuberculosis because she didn’t eat well, I know nothing about it.